Ceara Nic Finoghaleigh

One week to go...

Tue, 27 Apr 2004 01:54:37 GMT

Well Crown is this weekend and I am so excited. I have finished all of my sewing and even got the last draginfy on the dress yesterday. I finished all the elephants for Falcon and they go out in the mail tomorrow.

I have to make up my packing list and get the house clean and that is all I have on my plate.

So here is a question that I have for the masses. Do you find that you are more willing to give in and do something for someone because the whine and complain about it? That there life is somehow busier than yours and they can't do it themselves? I don't but I know someone that always seems to get their way because they whine and complain until someone feels bad for them and does it for them. I find this pretty sad. But it seems to work for them.

I feel really good with where Peter is with his Crown prep. He is feelin pretty good too. It still hasen't sunk in that in a week I could be Princess on my way to being the next Queen. Reguardless I wish everyone that is fighting luck.

Crown is Coming

Fri, 23 Apr 2004 13:55:15 GMT

Remind me never to put so much embroidery on a dress ever again. I feel like I have been working on it fr ages and it is still not done. If I can't finish the last 5 panels before next weekend I will have to wear one of my other dresses for Crown. Yes that is right I have only done 7 out of the 12 panels. It takes forever. I ran the machine for about 8 hours the other day just to get 2 panels done.AHHHHHH!
So anyway, I really am looking forward to Crown and regardless of the outcome I am looking forward to it being over. I want to be able to have time to hang out with my friends again without sewing deadlines hanging over my head. Also I am really excited about having my dinning room back. It would be nice to st at the table to eat dinner. I would also be able to work on some of the other projects that I have going including knitting and quilting.
I decided not to rush and get the quilt done for the contest for St. Jude's. However they accept quilts all year long so I think I will make one and donate it to them. This way I know that I can get it done and it will still go to help the hospital.
I did start Peter's quilt the other day and I have one block done and it looks great. I think he did a great job picking out fabrics. I really hope he likes it when it is done. I figure if I can get a block done a day (after crown) the I should have the top pieced in a month ready to quilt. I am actually doing all the piecing by hand so it might take a while.  
Well off to the machine so I can get this dress closer to completion

I need a little help

Wed, 14 Apr 2004 20:40:26 GMT

I know it has been way to long since I have updated (bad Angel bad) but things have been just rushing by lately that I keep forgetting about it.

Crown is coming up and my dress is almost done (doing happy dance) I couldn't have even imagined how long it was going to take to get the dragonflies on my dress. Remind me of this if Peter wins will ya.

So this is what I need help on...

Hancock fabric in conjunction with St. Judes hospital is having a quilt contest to help raise money for their hospital. Thy have come out with a line of fabric to be used in a quilt that will be entered in the contest and then given to one of the children at the hospital.

I know that I have not been quilting long but I would love to enter. I just need to figure out what to do. The theme is to design a 45' x 60' quilt that is inspired buy a dream that a child has had or one that a child could have. They provided a list of some of the dreams from the children and the one that caught my eye was one little girl wants to be a "rainbow maker". When I read that I cried. So I want to do something with that. I have some ideas running through my head but I could always use a little more.

If you want to see the fabrics you can see them here at www.hancockfabrics.com and click on the St. Jude fabric link. I have to use at least one of the fabrics in the quilt.

Help! Also if there is any other quilters that migt be interested in helping I would love to have it. Even though this is a contests for me it is more about raising the money and letting the children have a little happiness in their lives.

Land grab and love

Mon, 04 Aug 2003 16:14:05 GMT

Land grab is over. I must say that this is the most relaxing land grab I have ever had. I can honestly say that I was a slug, sleeping most of the time. My back which has been bothering since Wednesday night was killing me by the time I got up there. A few drugs latter and I slept on and off all weekend. Things got done but I just wish I was able to help more. My back is feeling great now I am all ready to go back up and have a blast. I am now finally in a Pennsic kind of mood.

So last night after the way to long drive home I was lying in bed next to my love and I had to think how lucky we were to find each other. I really wonder how this all happened. Was it just a coincidence? Did we both wish on the same star for the same things? Whatever it was I seem to be the luckiest person. He really makes my life whole. I know I babble about him often but I just can’t explain how happy he makes me.

Peter’s cottage looks AMAZING! I was so impressed by the amount of work he was able to get done and just how good it looks. That man rocks! I was so happy to be staying in the cottage on Saturday night when early Sunday morning the sky opened up and it down poured. We were able to sit in the cottage and be with each other and listen to the rain. Nice and dry. I think I can actually deal with a wet Pennsic when I know I have a nice warm dry place to come to at the end of the evening.

Also I have a project to do this year. I get to stain glass the windows. This should be a lot of fun. I just hope that I do a good enough job. At least the stuff can easily be removed if I make a horrible mistake. Well we shall see.

That seems to be it for me today. I might have more to babble about later.

Pennsic here I come

Fri, 01 Aug 2003 14:39:54 GMT

Well I leave for the first weekend of Pennsic tonight. I can’t say that I am all that excited about it because I still don’t have everything ready, my back hurts and it is going to be a lot of work. The fun won’t start for me until next weekend. But going up this weekend will be worth it because when I pull in next weekend I won’t have to go through troll or anything like that. I will be able to go right to camp and start enjoying myself. Not like three years ago when we got there at midnight and still had to set up and stuff. Also this year I have someone waiting for me. Which reminds me that I still need to get his favor done. Blah.

I saw the funniest thing on my way in to work today. I was driving down north Capitol St. and stopped at a stoplight. Well I just happened to glance over at the car to my right and I saw this lady reach over and pick something up. I thought it was a newspaper or something because people tend to do that when they are commuting to work around here. So I look back waiting for the light to change. Then I noticed that this stupid person in the left lane is trying to get to the right lane while stopped at a red light. You see at this particular stop light the left lane is left turn only and people always end up in that lane by accident and need to get over. So he pulls half way through the red light to get out of the way for the people trying to turn left. Well that is when I glanced back over the car on my right. She didn’t in fact pick up a newspaper or some other reading material she had picked up this white rat. It was a live rat that she was holding and petting. No I don’t have a problem with rodents but this was not what I was expecting to see at 8:30 in the morning.

So onto the Friday five.

1. What time do you wake up on weekday mornings?

I try to wake up between 7:30 and 7:40 to get ready for work.

2. Do you sleep in on the weekends? How late?

I sleep in only if I don’t have anything else to do. It is usually to like 10 and sometimes as late as noon.

3. Aside from waking up, what is the first thing you do in the morning?

I always go to the bathroom and wash my face.

4. How long does it take to get ready for your day?

It depends on how much time I have. If I have to get to work then I rush and can get ready in about 20 minutes half hour at most. If I don’t have anything to rush about it could take all day.

5. When possible, what is your favorite place to go for breakfast?

I don’t eat breakfast often but when I do I love going to Einstein Bagels.

Well all I hope to see some of you at Pennsic this weekend. If not I will see you next week. Now to just get through the day so I can get on the road. I am so glad there is going to be a bed for me when I get there.

More random babble

Thu, 31 Jul 2003 21:29:00 GMT

Once again I have put things off until the last minute. I have so much running around to do tonight that I will not be able to stitch at all. I will be lucky if I finish it all and have even a moment to myself. But then again I did this to myself. I have known all week that I had to have all of my stuff ready to leave for Pennsic by tonight.

So last night my grand plan of being in bed before 11 fell to the wayside. I ended up going to sleep around 12:30. This was after I blew everything off and talked to a friend for 3 hours on the phone.

Also my back is killing me and I have yet to even start the massive amount of packing I need to do tonight. Oh well enough whining…

Just an update

Wed, 30 Jul 2003 19:01:22 GMT

Pennsic is fast upon us and this is the first year that I haven’t been in a complete tizzy about getting ready. I have almost all of my stuff packed and on its way, the other half I will pack tomorrow night. Then Friday I head up to Land Grab. I know it is going to be the same as last year. I am going to get up there and then I am just not going to want to come home on Sunday. At least I will get to go back up next Friday and stay the week. So as far as my Pennsic prep goes I am just not going to stress it. I am going to go and have fun and relax.

Things have been going crazy in my life right now. At least it has all been good for the most part. I have been somewhat concerned with the speed in which my relationship with Peter is becoming more serious. We have been talking more and more about me moving into his house when he feels ready. We have been talking about forever a lot more then we ever have before. This all makes me happy I am just concerned that we are not slowing down enough to learn each other’s habits and we just have so much more that we need to work on before we should live together I just don’t want to mess it up. I love this man and I want to spend many years of my life with him. Do I think forever? I can’t say. Nothing lasts forever; I would rather say the rest of my life, and to decided that after only 8 months together is just a little crazy. I do know that no man has ever made me this happy and my days are better because of him.

On the needlework front the new is good. I have been working on some great projects and might even finish one within the month of August. So hopefully I will be happy dancing over a few projects in the next couple of months. Right now I need to focus on get a favor done for my love. He wants a favor that he can wear when he fights and I have to finish it so he can have it for Pennsic. Lately however I have been finding it difficult to work on anything but Maidens of the Seasons (my current project). So I think tonight I am going to have to force myself to put away my Maiden and actually get a good chunk of the favor done. It really isn’t going to take long I just need to sit and do it. Tonight just might be the night for that because I think I am going to be way too tired to concentrate on a larger project. I will just have to bring my project with me and sit in camp and enjoy a couple of hours stitching time a day. Can’t you tell that I am heart broken about this?

So for the next two weeks I have Peter’s house all to myself. At first I was dreading this. Now I am somewhat enjoying it. I have time to do things at my pace and the way I want to do them. I don’t have any problem doing things for Peter however it is nice not having to do anything for anyone but myself for a few days. I can go to sleep whenever I wish and eat dinner when ever I wish. Also I have the whole bed to myself. I love sleeping next to Peter but it is also nice being able to spread from one end of the bed to the other with out someone getting upset or taking all the blankets. The best part in all of this is there is no SNORING!!! It was hard for me to fall asleep last night but once I was asleep I slept like a baby. Tonight is going to be an early night for me as well because I need to make sure I am up and on time for work tomorrow not to mention I went to sleep at almost 1 in the morning.

Just a few things

Thu, 03 Jul 2003 21:51:30 GMT

Where does the time go? I can’t believe that it has been so long since I last wrote. I feel like I have been just running non stop. Thank god I have people in my life like Peter. He clams me down and gets me through the rough times. I really do love that man.

So tomorrow is the 4th of July. A time when we should remember exactly the freedoms that we have as Americans. And I do actually think about stuff like that. I know that I may bitch about things I think are wrong with this country and the government, but at least I have the right to say those things without getting shot. Also is a time for fun in the sun and good food. Oh! I can’t leave out the fireworks! We are having a cook out over at Peter’s tomorrow and I am so excited/nervous. I can’t wait to see everyone and meet new people but the other part of me feels that I am one of the hosts and I need to make sure that everyone is having a good time before I can even think of having fun.

I have once again found my love of needlework. For so long after my divorce I didn’t touch my stitching and I really thought that I would never stitch again. I had no passion for it and I was uninspired by any of the patterns that were in my collection or in the stores. But now I am stitching again and I am even working on finishing stuff that I started while I was still married. I really can’t express how much joy this brings me. Now I just have to find time to weave.

So there are two fun happy things going on in my life. Hopefully more later.

An update

Fri, 04 Apr 2003 19:29:57 GMT

Well what can I say there has been a lot going on not only in my life but also in the world. Let me see if I can recap everything without making this a book.

1. We are at war. There really isn’t much else to say about that. It is sad but it was expected. I sit and think about the troops and wish them a safe and quick trip home. I have several friends in the military and they are in my thoughts and prayers as well as their families. I know that there really is no way to thank them for what they are doing, so I guess our support and well wishes will have to do. I really can’t say if I support the war or not because my opinions on the subject wavier. All I have to say is this. People can protest the war all they want but what is done is done. What we need to do right now is to support our troops over seas no matter what our thoughts are about war. Do I like the idea that we are sending our troops over seas to kill people and possibly be killed? No. Do I like the fact that they are fighting to make us feel a little safer and to protect us? Yes. That is all I really have to say about the subject.

2. Gulf Wars! It was a great time. The battles were fun to watch and the people were great. I met a lot of really cool people that I hope to see again, maybe even next year at Gulf Wars! The shopping was fun as well. There were not as many merchants as there are at Pennsic but I found almost everything I was looking for and then some. I got my inkle loom that I have been thinking about buying. I bought two rings that I just love so much so that I have worn them almost everyday since I got back. I bought a couple of books and a new basket form the basket man. I now have two of his baskets and I love them and use them a lot. I think the best part was I got to spend the time I was there with Peter. It was a whole new camping experience with him. He made me realize that camping with any amount of people does not have to be work. It was relaxing and for the first time I didn’t feel like I was taking care of everyone. The trip home was an adventure but we made it and I can still say that I had a blast and want to go back.

3. Projects, projects, projects! I have so many SCA related projects that I want to get done. The list seems to grow by the day. Let’s see if I can list some of them. Boots- this is on the top of my list. Ever since I lost one of my boots I have been itching to get some new ones. So with Peters help I am making not only boots but shoes as well. Leather mugs- this is a project that Peter wants to do so I am not really sure what this is going to involve. Garb- this is a big one for me. Not only do I want to make new garb but I want period garb. While at Gulf Wars Peter bought me Drea Leeds book on Flemish work dresses. I think I need to try one of these. Maybe even two or three. I also just want my stuff to be better made. Other sewing projects- I have several things that I have been asked to make so I guess I better get moving.

4. My weaving. What can I say about this? I have been having fun and I have been learning a lot. I have started a weaving book so that I can keep track of the projects that I have been doing and so that I can keep track of my progress. I think that my weaving from last August to now has improved 100%. I have been having problems reading the patterns at times but I have also developed a system that helps me with that as well. It is somewhat slow but it works. I now have two looms with the use of a third and a forth on it’s way at the end of May. I have an inkle loom and a card loom both of which I have completed several projects. The third is a four-harness table loom that I don’t even know how to warp yet. As soon as I can sit down with it I will hopefully get a project warped up on it. The last one is a ridged heddle loom that someone was giving away. I will be able to pick this one up at the end of May. When I first started to weave I had no idea that I would enjoy it do much but I have found that I love it. It seems that my needlework has been pushed to the side to make way for this new craft. It also seems that everyday I am adding yet another new project to the weaving list.

5. Moving- I am moving tomorrow. I hate moving. At least it shouldn’t be that bad.

Well I will have more after the move.

Something to think about

Thu, 06 Mar 2003 21:56:36 GMT

What a statement this makes on today's world...

It's hard to believe that we have lived as long as
we have. My Mom used to cut chicken, chop eggs
and spread mayo on the same cutting board with
the same knife and no bleach, but we didn't seem
to get food poisoning.
My Mom used to defrost hamburger on the counter
and I used to eat it raw sometimes too, but I can't
remember getting E-coli. As children we would ride
in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the
back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a
special treat. Our baby cribs, toys and rooms were
painted with bright colored lead based paint. We,
often chewed on the crib, ingesting the paint. We
had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors,
or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes we had no
helmets. We drank water from the garden hose and
not from a bottle. We would leave home in the morning
and play all day, as long as we were back when the
streetlights came on. No one was able to reach us all
day.
We played dodge ball and sometimes the ball would
really hurt. We played with toy guns, cowboys and
Indians, army, cops and robbers, and used our fingers
to simulate guns when the toy ones or my BB gun was
not available. We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and
drank sugar soda, but we were never overweight; we
were always outside playing. Little League had tryouts
and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't,
had to learn to deal with disappointment. Some students
weren't as smart as others or didn't work hard so they
failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade.
That generation produced some of the greatest risk-takers
and problem solvers. We had the freedom, failure, success
and responsibility, and we learned how to deal with it all.
Almost all of us would have rather gone swimming in the
lake instead of a pristine pool (talk about boring), the term
cell phone would have conjured up a phone in a jail cell,
and a pager was the school PA system. We all took gym,
not PE... and risked permanent injury with pair of high
top Ked's (only worn in gym) instead of having cross-
training athletic shoes with air cushion soles and built
in light reflectors. I can't recall any injuries but they must
have happened because they tell us how much safer we
are now. Flunking gym was not an option... even for stupid
kids! I guess PE must be much harder than gym.
Every year, someone taught the whole school a lesson
by running in the halls with leather soles on linoleum
tile and hitting the wet spot. How much better off would
we be today if we only knew we could have sued the
school system. Speaking of school, we all said prayers
and the pledge and staying in detention after school
caught all sorts of negative attention for the next two
weeks. We must have had horribly damaged psyches.
I can't understand it. Schools didn't offer 14 year olds
an abortion or condoms (we wouldn't have known
what either was anyway) but they did give us a couple
of baby aspirin and cough syrup if we started getting
the sniffles. What an archaic health system we had then. Remember school
nurses? Ours wore a hat and everything.
I thought that I was supposed to accomplish something
before I was allowed to be proud of myself. I just can't
recall how bored we were without computers, PlayStation, Nintendo, X-box or
270 digital cable stations.
I must be repressing that memory as I try to rationalize
through the denial of the dangers could have befallen
us as we trekked off each day about a mile down the
road to some guy's vacant 20, built forts out of branches
and pieces of plywood, made trails, and fought over
who got to be the Lone Ranger. What was that property
owner thinking, letting us play on that lot. He should
have been locked up for not putting up a fence around
the property, complete with a self-closing gate and an
infrared intruder alarm.
Oh yeah... and where was the Benadryl and sterilization
kit when I got that bee sting? I could have been killed!
We played king of the hill on piles of gravel left on vacant construction
sites and when we got hurt, Mom pulled out
the 48 cent bottle of mercurochrome and then we got our
butt spanked. Now it's a trip to the emergency room,
followed by a 10-day dose of a $49 bottle of antibiotics and
then Mom calls the attorney to sue the contractor for leaving
a horribly vicious pile of gravel where it was such a threat.
We didn't act up at the neighbor's house either because
if we did, we got our butt spanked (physical abuse) here
too ... and then we got our butt spanked again when we got
home.
Mom invited the door to door salesman inside for coffee,
kids choked down the dust from the gravel driveway while
playing with Tonka trucks (remember why Tonka trucks
were made tough... it wasn't so that they could take the
rough berber in the family room), and Dad drove a car with
leaded gas.
Our music had to be left inside when we went out to play
and I am sure that I nearly exhausted my imagination a
couple of times when we went on two week vacations. I
should probably sue the folks now for the danger they
put us in when we all slept in campgrounds in the family
tent. Summers were spent behind the push lawnmower
and I didn't even know that mowers came with motors until
I was 13 and we got one without an automatic blade-stop
or an auto-drive. How sick were my parents?
Of course my parents weren't the only psychos. I recall
Joey from next door coming over and doing his tricks
on the front stoop just before he fell off. Little did his
Mom know that she could have owned our house.
Instead she picked him up and swatted him for being
such a goof. It was a neighborhood run amuck..
To top it off, not a single person I knew had ever been
told that they were from a dysfunctional family. How
could we possibly have known that we needed to get
into group therapy and anger management classes?
We were obviously so duped by so many societal ills,
that we didn't even notice that the entire country wasn't
taking Prozac!
How did we survive?

A huge loss

Fri, 28 Feb 2003 02:50:07 GMT

Well, I know that I haven’t been much at updating my journal lately. I have been lost in my own world. I guess being in love will do that to you. Well that little world came crashing down around my head this evening.

I got a call about 9:00pm telling me that one of my oldest friends in the SCA passes away from a heart attack this afternoon. James Howell was a wonderful person who opened is heart and arms for everyone. He was one of the first people that I met in the SCA. He helped me find my place in the SCA. I just can’t say enough about him to express what a wonderful person he was and what an impact he had on the SCA and its people.

Right now I am just a bit numb and when I think about it I cry. I just can’t believe he is gone.

Finnr I will miss you dearly and always remember what you did and who you are.

Just an update

Mon, 27 Jan 2003 15:29:41 GMT

Ok so I am slacking in a big way as far as updating this journal. I have been busy. I know not an excuse but there you have it. So lets see if I might be able to give you an update without taking all day to write. I can’t even remember what I wrote about last time, well here goes…

I got a tattoo. And I must say it is beautiful, expensive but beautiful. It is a dragonfly with vines on either side. I got it done on my lower back. It still hurt a little after almost two weeks but I keep telling myself that it was well worth it.

My birthday was great. I love when my birthday is on a holiday weekend. Got to spend the weekend with very special people. Spent Saturday being lazy and carefree. Then on Sunday went down to Richmond with Peter and hung out with everyone there. I have to say that he is absolutely wonderful to put up with doing what ever I wanted to do. I have to find a way to make it up to him. Then on Monday I made a big pot of chili and went to fight practice. Over all one of the best birthdays ever. Thanks to everyone who got me a gift you didn’t have to do that, and thank you all for making it so great.

Catch up

Mon, 06 Jan 2003 03:16:44 GMT

Goodness I didn’t realize that it has been so long since I have written. The holidays really do make you lose time don’t they?

My holidays were nice. It means so much to me when I get to spend them with people that I love. They just went by so fast that I can’t even remember them clearly. I ended up sick for the weekend after Christmas and that really helped with the losing time thing. I am still weak enough from it that I am sleeping way more than normal.

My dad’s installation was today and I must say that I was really impressed. Even though I have been a member of the Masonic family for years now, I think I was 16 when I joined, it still amazes me everyday the amount of love and commitment these people have. It was a long ceremony and in all honesty I could have done without it, however it was really nice to see that my dad is so well loved and respected. This really is an opportunity of a lifetime for my parents and I hope that I can help them in any way over the next year. My responsibilities to my parents over the next year might have to take priority over the SCA for a while as far as how I split my time. Like the SCA most of the event and activities that will be taking place are on the weekends. Looking at the schedule today I am going to be busy.

The other thing that happened while I was there was I ran into two people who were very active in my Bethel when I was in Job’s Daughters. As I talked to them I remembered how much I loved that group and I miss being active with them. I have been giving considerable thought to actually becoming a member of Eastern Star now that I am a bit older and have a little time to put into it. My fear is that getting involved with the Eastern Star right now with take me out of the SCA for a while. You see the Masonic organizations can take up just as much time if not more then the SCA does if I want to do it right. It is going to be a tough decision to make and I have several people that I need to talk to about it before I make my decision.

There really isn’t much more happening right now that I can think of. I am getting ready to throw myself back into the SCA after my self-imposed break. I am still at a toss up regarding 12th night. I really want to go and hang around people but I am not sure I want to make the trip or if I am even ready to go back to events again. You see right after Pennsic I had to back away from the SCA for my own good. I have not been able to deal with large groups of people for extended lengths of time since then. There have been a lot of emotional stuff going on and removing my self from people has help with sorting those things out. Now that I have done that and my personal life finally seems to be going well I can start getting back involved and at the level that I want. It is going to take time and think the real test is going to be Ymir in February. I am looking forward to it, but it scares me a bit. I went to a local event yesterday and I was able to make it about two hours before the people got to me and I had to leave. Not sure if that was because of my sudden aversion to people in the four months or the fact that I ended up with a killer migraine last night.

I know that I need to be strong over this next week. I have so much that I need to do with work and stuff that I need to keep focused and keep my wits about me. However I have found my mind wandering every once in a while. A very special person to me is out of town this week and already I miss him. It is hard not being able to talk to that person I call up to share my bubbles and my sorrows with. But it is just a week and I think I can survive. He will just have to hear all about my week when he gets home.

Well I see I have written much more then I expected and I hope now that I have caught up I can keep this thing up to date with small entries every day. I hope all is well and everyone had save and enjoyable holidays.

Mon, 23 Dec 2002 21:14:48 GMT

Two days before Christmas. Wow where did the year go? It is truly amazing the amount of thing that happen in a year. Last year at this time I don’t think I could have been more depressed. My marriage had fallen apart, I didn’t have a job, I weighed more than I ever have and in general I was alone. Now this year I am divorced and enjoying life more because of it, have a job that I love, have lost some of the weight with a goal to lose more, and have people close to my heart. Unlike last year I am going to spend the holidays with my family and people that I love very dearly. So to say that things have changed in my life this past year is an understatement.

I hope everyone has a wonderful Christmas filled with love and good company.

So now I leave you with one of my favorite versions of the 12 days of Christmas.

Cajun 12 Days of Christmas
Day 1
Dear Boudreaux,
Thanks for de bird in de Pear tree. I fix it las'night with dirty rice. I doan tink de pear tree will grow in de swamp, so I swap it for a Satsuma.
Marie
Day 2
Dear Boudreaux,
You letter say you sent two turtle doves, but all I got was two scrawny pigeons. Anyway, I mixed dem with andouille an made some gumbo out of dem.
Marie
Day 3
Dear Boudreaux,
Why doan you sent some crawfish? I'm tired of eating dem darn birds. I gave two of dose prissy French chickens to Marie Trahan over at Grans Bayou an fed the tird one to my dog Phideaux. Marie needed some sparring partners for her fighting rooster.
Marie
Day 4
Dear Boudreaux,
Mon Dieux! I tol you no more xxxxx birds. Deez four, what you call dem "calling birds" were so noisy you could hear dem all de way to Napoleonville. I used dere necks for my crab traps, an fed de rest of dem to de gators.
Marie
Day 5
Dear Boudreaux,
You finally sen' somethin useful. I like dem golden rings, me. I hocked dem at da pawn shop in Thibodeaux and got enuf money to fix da shaft on my shrimp boat an buy a round for da boys at de Raisin' Cane Lounge. Merci Beaucoup!
Marie
Day 6
Dear Boudreaux,
Couchon! Back to da birds, you Cajun turkey! Poor egg suckin' Phideaux is scared to death at dem six geeses. He tried to eat dems eggs and dey peck de heck out ah his snout. Dey good at eating cockroaches, though. I may stuff one of dem wit erster dressing on Christmas day.
Marie
Day 7
Dear Boudreaux, I'm gonna wring your fool neck next time I see you. Thibeau, da mailman, is ready to kill ya. The merde from all dem birds is stinkin' up his mailboat. He afraid someone will slip on dat stuff and sue him good. I let those seven swans loose to swim on de bayou and some duck hunters from Mississippi blasted dem out of de water. Talk to you tomorrow.
Marie
Day 8
Dear Boudreaux,
Poor ole Thibeau, he had to make tree trips on his mailboat to deliver dem 8 maids a milkin and their cows. One of dem cows got spooked by da alligators and almost tipped over da boat. I doan like dem shiftless maids, me no. I tolt dem to get to work guttin fish and sweepinq the shack but dey say it wasn't in dair contract. Dey probably think dey too good ta skin nutrias I caught las night.
Marie
Day 9
Dear Boudreaux,
What you trying to do huh? Thibeau had to borrow the Lutcher ferry to carry dem jumpin twits you call Lords-a-Leaping across the bayou. As soon as dey gots here dey wanted a tea break with crumpets. I doan know what dat means but I says, "Well La Di Da. You get Chicory coffee or nuttin." Mon Dieu, Emile. What I'm gonna feed all dese bozos? Dey too snooty for fried nutria, and de cows done eat my turnip greens.
Marie
Day 10
Dear Boudreaux,
You got to be outs you mind! If de mailman don't kill you, I will fo sure. Today he deliver 10 half nikid floozies from Bourbon Street. Dey said dey be "Ladies Dancin" but dey doan act like ladies in front of dose Limey twits. Dey almos left after one of dem got bit by a water moccasin over by da out-house. I had to butcher 2 cows to feed toute le monde an had to get toilet paper; the Sears catalog wasn't good enuf fer dose hoity toity Lords' royal behin'.
Marie
Day 11
Dear Boudreaux,
Where y'at? Cheerio an pip pip. Your 11 pipers piping arrives today from the House of Blues, second lining as dey got off de boat. We fixed stuffed goose and beef jambalaya and we having a fais-do-do. Da new mailman he having a good time, yeah, dancing with de floozies. Thibeau he jump off de Sunshine Bridge yesterday, screaming your name. If you get a mysterious, ticking package in de mail, doan open it.
Marie
Day 12
Dear Boudreaux,
I sorry to tell ya but I not your true love anymore, no. After da fais-do-do, I spent de night with Jacque, de head piper. We decide to open a restaurant and gentleman's club on de bayou. The floozies, pardon me, Ladies dancing can make $20 for a table dance, and de Lords can be waiters an valet park de boats. Since de maids doan have no more cows ta milk, I trained dem ta set my crab traps, watch my trotlines, an run my shrimping business. We will probably gross a million nex year.
Marie

Can The Gluttony Stop... Please?

Wed, 18 Dec 2002 20:10:09 GMT

Where has the time gone? I have been so wrapped up in my own issues and life that I haven’t really had time to stop and check on other people. So how is everyone? I hope all is well.

You know I find it really interesting that it is ok for people to get absorbed in themselves when things are bad or something tragic happens. But what about when something good happens and all you want to do is bubble about it? Is it still ok to be self-absorbed? Just a though that popped into my head. I guess it is because there are some people that feel that they have more of a right to talk about their lives because what is happening to them is so horrible and tragic. But if I mention good things in my life, and there are a lot of good things going on right now, that I really shouldn’t talk about them because I am rubbing it in their face. And the typical response of “It must be nice” that drips with envy and insincerity really is starting to get on my nerves in the worse way.

Last night was the girls only Christmas dinner with the ladies at work. I was wonderful. This was the first time that I have had anything that my boss has cooked. And I must say that it was beyond amazing. You see my boss’s first passion is really cooking. When she was getting out of high school and deciding on her career path they were not allowing women into the Culinary Institute of America. So she went into a field that she was able to work in. Never really giving up on her passions she spends much of her free time taking classes at the CIA and teaching in the area. So needless to say she is a wonderful cook.

You what I think is a great word? Yummy. Isn’t that just a great word? You can use it for so many things. I think it is a great word.

So anyway back to the party. The dinner was fabulous. Then we sat down and exchanged gifts and ran our mouths until it was very late indeed. So it was just a wonderful time. But if you add together the amount of food, the 5 or so glasses of wine and the late hour I was in a mood last night.

Did you know that time flies like the wind but fruit flies like bananas? Apparently I made this clear sometime last night. After I left my boss’s mind you.

Then today we had a small celebration for the company’s 20 year anniversary. More good food and company. One of the guys that I work with put together this power point presentation for the president that was so funny I thought I was going to pee my pants. Now there is a visual for you.

Tomorrow another guy that I work with is taking me and several of the other ladies at work out for lunch. So I think I can safely say that by the end of the holiday season I will be more than burned out on food.

Well I guess I have to get back to work. Although I would much rather nap.

Funny how these things happen

Sun, 15 Dec 2002 22:18:26 GMT

Well it is funny how things work out. Yesterday I was complaining that I really didn’t want to have to deal with finding a place to live with my brother because of the location etc. Well he calls today and he was offered a job down in FL. Which means he doesn’t need me to move in with him. Great big happy dance for me!

I realized this morning that I have been putting off doing my Christmas shopping for so long that it really is getting close to some gift giving deadlines. I have a Christmas dinner to go to this Tuesday and I haven’t even started shopping for the four people that I have to give gifts to. Guess the main reason is that these are all people that I work with and I haven’t been at the job long enough to know what they would really like. I have a few ideas and I am hoping that I can get everything today so that I can get them wrapped.

Other than that I don’t really have much to do. I have very little money this year until after the new year. So it seems that most people that I know in the SCA are getting 12th night gifts instead of Christmas. I feel bad about this because I had some great ideas for gifts for people but I have hit some difficulties that have just mad it impossible for me to spend the money right now

I am finally getting use to the new computer and I really must say that I love it. The one thing I need to do is stop hitting the mouse pad while I am typing. It makes for some interesting reading let me tell you. But overall I am really happy with it. I will also be able to get some work done from home and not have to stay at the office so late anymore. Not that I mind doing that in the summer when it is still light outside when I leave, but I hate it in the winter time when the sun goes down at 4 in the afternoon and I am sitting alone in the office after hours. It is kind of creepy.

I also think that I will be able to update my journal more often because I will have my computer with me all the time. So when I have some down time I can actually sit and write and stuff. I use to love to write. When I was younger I always had a pen and paper and would jot down thoughts and ideas whenever they came to me. Now I hate writing by hand because it takes longer get the thought out on paper and eventually it will have to be put in the computer so why do the work twice.

I have come to the conclusion that I need to start doing things for me again. Things that are good for the soul. I have got so caught up in everything else that I have forgotten to take the time to do things that balance me. And boy do I need to be balanced right now.

Well enough babbling from me for one day. I have some shopping to do.

Life is full of choices

Sun, 15 Dec 2002 00:55:00 GMT

So here I am on a Saturday afternoon after a very strange and frustrating day. I was going most of the afternoon fighting with FedEx trying to find where my computer is. After much yelling and fussing I went to pick up my machine from the local hub. Saying that I was upset is an understatement. I had to rearrange all of my plans, fall further behind on work because they couldn’t get my package to me when they were suppose to. Now I have it and it is almost set up so that I can do some work this evening and still be able to get some of my personal stuff done. I hate that. I will also never use FedEx ground ever again if I have a choice. There customer service sucks and I just saw and dealt with some issues that I would not ever want to deal with again.

So anyway I had an unexpected day away from everything and it was really nice. I was able to start a new project and get a good chunk of that done. I was able to read some and also take a nap. I also had a long conversation with my brother.

You see my brother lost his job about three months ago. Where he lives there are no jobs available for him. If he moves up here then he has a better chance of finding a job. The problem is that he wants me to move in with him and his wife so that we can all save money, however he wants to move to Reston. This doesn’t seem all that bad other than the fact that not a single part of my life is out there right now. I don’t work anywhere near there. Not to mention that all of my activities outside of work tends to happen in MD nowhere near where we would move. I really want to help him out but at what cost? I don’t want to inconvenience my life just to help him out. I love my brother and want to see him find a job ad be happy. I just don’t think that I will be all that happy in that situation. If I move then I will not be able to attend fight practice or do anything else I do in MD during the week. My time spent there would be limited to the weekends. I am not sure I want to make that sacrifice. But how can I not help my brother? I just don’t know what is going to happen.

Well I really don’t have much more to say. I now have to go and deal with all the work stuff I have put off today.

100 things you must know

Thu, 12 Dec 2002 16:37:17 GMT

OK so here is a challenge that I received from a friend of mine. I was challenged with listing 100 things that I want people to know about me. It seems kind of easy but I have a feeling that it is going to be much harder then it first appears. So here I go…

1. I am the youngest of 5 children
2. When I was younger I went by the name Lori instead of Angel
3. My middle name is Lorena (this is where I got Lori from)
4. I am the world’s worse speller
5. My grandfather and I are the only red heads in the family as far as we know
6. We are also the only two left handed people in the family
7. I have been more places outside the US then I have inside the US
8. When I was 8 I use to do my sisters math homework (she was in High School)
9. I hate onions but I cook with them all the time
10. The sight of my own blood makes me sick
11. My father died when I was 2 ½
12. I did gymnastics for 12 years
13. I broke both of my ankles at the same time
14. I have been in the play “Midsummer Night’s Dream” four times
15. I love to read
16. I don’t have my tonsils
17. I bite my nails
18. I cry at sappy movies
19. I sing in the car
20. I love to do yoga
21. I listen to country music
22. I use to wear braces
23. I only keep in touch with one person from high school
24. I hate baseball with a passion
25. My first word was Bye-bye when I was 9 months old
26. I was walking before I was a year old
27. I have been wearing glasses since I was 12 years old
28. I refused to learn to ride a bike until I was 12
29. I took 5 years of Latin in School
30. I use to speak German but I don’t remember any of it
31. I own a green Saturn that I hate with a passion
32. I love my job
33. I sleep with a teddy bear now and never did when I was a child
34. My eyes change colors with my mood and what I wear
35. I am divorced
36. I love the smell of a wood fire
37. My favorite color is green
38. Even though I took a typing class in high school I still have to look at my fingers when I type
39. I can’t help but sing in the car
40. I have been doing needlework since I was 5
41. I hate wearing skirts or dresses outside the SCA
42. I hate wearing shoes
43. I love watching movies but I rarely go and see them in the theater
44. I am very shy around people I don’t know
45. I am terrified of spiders
46. I hate being alone
47. My most productive time of the day is mid morning
48. I love to cook for people
49. I hate grocery shopping, doing the dishes and vacuuming
50. There isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for my close friends

Half way there! This is really hard. Let’s see if I can get another 50 things. Do you think I can make it?

51. I hated playing with Barbie when I was younger I preferred to play with GI Joes
52. I used to be the only girl in the neighborhood that would play football with the guys
53. I have always gotten along much better with guys then I do with girls
54. I prefer to drink water over anything else
55. I have only been in love twice in my life
56. The first thing I notice about a guy is his eyes and his hands
57. I love having someone brush my hair
58. I love to buy shoes
59. I get migraine headaches so bad that they make me sick to my stomach
60. Accepting a compliment is one of the hardest things for me to do
61. I have five nephews and no nieces
62. If I don’t write things down then they don’t exist
63. When I was younger I use to lay under the Christmas tree and stare up at the lights.
64. My grandfather was a big influence on my life
65. I think I only read maybe three required reading book all the way through when I was in high school but still managed to pass all of the test and essays
66. I love being in the company of good people
67. Someday I want to have children
68. I usually go to bed at 11 at night
69. The only thing I miss from my marriage is having someone to fall asleep next to
70. When I was younger I use to roller skate where ever I went
71. I miss spending time on my grandfather’s farm
72. I can still do the splits
73. I hate being late for anything, I would rather show up 20 minutes early then to get there 1 minute late
74. I can never my family member’s birthdays
75. I use to work in a daycare
76. I taught myself how to sew
77. When I went to college I was a theater major but then changed my mind and went into accounting
78. I have never dated a younger man
79. My first boyfriend was when I was in first grade
80. I use to collect porcelain dolls
81. Every piece of needlework that I have ever entered into a competition has won a ribbon
82. When I get really angry, I get very quiet
83. I keep all my DVD’s in alphabetical order
84. The only time I really listen to music is when I am in the car
85. I didn’t get my driver’s license until I was 17
86. I have never had a one night stand
87. I prefer Pepsi over Coke and I like Sprite more than both of them
88. I have had to kill my own food before
89. The shortest time I have ever stayed at a job was for 2 days
90. The longest time I have stayed at a job was for two years
91. I still have not graduated from college (some day I hope)
92. If I could have the job of my dreams it would be to own and run a successful bakery in a small town
93. My dream house would be close enough to the city to enjoy all the conveniences but far enough out in the country so that I can have my space
94. My favorite song is “I Should Have Been a Cowboy” by Toby Keith, that song never fails to put a smile on my face
95. I cry every time I hear the song “Greatest Man I Never Knew”
96. I started acting when I was 5
97. I have only ever been given flowers four times in my whole life
98. I have a necklace that I have not taken off in 5 years
99. I use to want to write a book
100. I love to talk on the phone

Wow! That was much harder than I though. There are plenty of things that I could have shared but it was one of those things that I had to stop and think if I wanted some of the stuff posted in such a public forum. So do you think you could come up with a list of 100 things about yourself? Come on give it a try. I know you can do it.

Random Babble

Tue, 10 Dec 2002 15:32:19 GMT

Good morning all! I hope that things are well with everyone. I know that I have not updated in almost a week, I have been such a slacker. I just want to let everyone know that I am doing much better and really I have not lost my mind, at least not that I know of.

There really isn’t much for me to say today. The holidays are fast approaching and I have not done a single thing to get ready for them. Not one bit of shopping not one bit of decorating. And in all honesty I really don’t care that much if it gets done or not. I have very few gifts to buy this year and I can spread them out between 12th Night and Christmas. So I am not going to sweat it.

Speaking of 12th Night, I haven’t even started my dress. I am hoping that that will change after this weekend. I think if I work everything right that I should be able to do the things I need to get done this weekend. I have the event on Saturday then on Sunday I need time to get my dress started and I have to be back in the DC area to get to the business meeting Sunday night. That just means I have to kick Kevin in the butt and make sure he gets me home on time.

The other really exciting thing that I had happen in the last couple of days is that I am getting a laptop computer from my company. Originally I was thinking I was going to have to buy it myself but the company is going to pick up the bill. I ordered it last Friday and it should be in by the end of the week! Great big happy dance!

I heard on the radio this morning that they are calling for freezing rain tonight and tomorrow. I really hate the winter but if I have to suffer through it then the though of getting snowed in or in this case iced in with someone is the way to go, especially if that person has a fireplace. (sigh) I miss having a fireplace to curl up in front of. Oh well maybe in my dream house.

Well folks as I am just sitting here babbling I will leave you to go and get some work done.

Hopefully I will write more tomorrow!

To eat or not to eat

Wed, 04 Dec 2002 16:21:45 GMT

Well good morning to all. I know that I concerned some of you yesterday and you have to believe me when I say that I am ok. You see yesterday was just a “fat day”. I am better now but I still feel that I need to explain this to people.

When I was 8 years old I stopped eating. I was in gymnastics and for me to compete at the level that I though I should I stopped eating. For me it was a matter of being competitive and later became a way for me to control my life. You see most people feel that anorexia is all about weight loss and for most people it starts off that way. However it tend to turn into a control issue for them. Things go bad and the only thing they can control is how much they eat. It is sick I know but it is a illness that I have struggled with for more than half my life.

One of the things that I learned when I was being treated was that I have to tell people about it. If I tell people about my destructive behavior then they notice when I start to lose my footing and do something stupid. Does this mean that I need babysitters? No, it just means that sometimes I start down that path and I don’t even notice it. Sometimes it just takes someone to point things out to me.

So what does all of this have to do with my mood yesterday? Well I learned something when I was going through recovery. That sometime I am going to get up in the morning and I am not going to like what I see. That I have for so long had a distorted view of what I look like that I can no longer view myself the way I really am. And I have over the years learned to fight that but every once in a while it gets the better of me. It is what I have started to call “Fat Days”. These are days that I just don’t like what I see in the mirror. These are really hard days for me to get through. Yesterday was one of them.

On top of the already bad day I ended up watching a movie about eating disorders last night. This movie could have been about my life. Including exact lines that I can remember hearing when I was younger. At first I thought that this would make things worse but it was just the opposite. I cried and got upset but in the end it was good to know that I have made it past a very difficult time in my life. No matter how much I want to lose the weight I don’t ever want to have to go back to where I was when I was 17. I spent six months in a hospital trying to gain enough weight that they would let me out. It was a nightmare. Not only was my freedom taken away I was treated like I had committed a horrible crime. Every meal that I ate was monitored. I was not allowed to go to the bathroom by myself for fear that I would make myself throw up. I would have to weigh in every day but was unable to look at the scale to see how fat I was getting. We had to step on the scale backwards so that they could record our progress without us seeing it. In the end I had to have feeding tubs put down my throat because they were scared that I was going to die.

I still struggle every day with this stuff. There are just little things that I do that are symptoms of the greater problem. I will never eat alone in a restaurant. Not only that but if I go to pick up food I will not pick up food for other people. I do this because the though of someone thinking that I would eat all that food by myself scares me. I never finish what is on my plate even if I am still hungry. If I am in large groups of people I can’t eat. Not only that my I mentally count ever fat gram and calorie that I put in my mouth.

But I know now to ask for help. I know that I can’t do this to myself anymore. I know that when I wake up in the morning I have to ask myself “I am going to love myself or hate myself today?” I am glad that most days I decide that I am going to love myself.

So today I did wake up asking myself that. Love won, and I went to the kitchen and fixed myself breakfast. So I think today is going to be ok.

Just want to cry

Tue, 03 Dec 2002 22:53:19 GMT

I just want to warn everyone that this is not a happy entry. When I write I try not to get sad and depressing because the last thing that people want to hear is how awful things are. I try to stick to the light hearted and fun. But for some reason today I just can’t do it. I am really down for some reason. I am really hoping it is because I am tired and need to get some rest, however I feel that it is something more than that. All day I have been fighting to keep myself from crying. All of the things I have been excited about I am no longer interested in doing. I know I know please don’t send me a million and one emails telling me that I am depressed. I figured that one out already. What I don’t understand is why? I just need to get out and do stuff so that I won’t sit around and get more depressed. Usually if I go out and do stuff I start to feel better. But tonight I want to just curl up and cry. Well I am going to end this now. Don’t worry I will be better tomorrow.

My Christmas List

Mon, 02 Dec 2002 15:49:32 GMT

The holiday was wonderful. I can't remember having such a good time in the past several years. Spending time with friends always makes me feel renewed. It was a little odd eating away form the family and I thought I was going to miss them, however I did not miss them but I did think of them. I felt bad when I got home and found out that not only was I not there but the house full of people they were expecting did make it either so they had dinner just the two of them. My mom says that she prefers it that way.

Well everyone has been asking me what I want for Christmas so instead of constantly telling everyone over and over again I will just write it down…

Pair of Pearl Earrings
Pearl Ring (size 7)
Gift certificate to Barnes and Noble
Gift certificate to MAC
Dressmakers dummy
Inkle loom
Warping board
“Well Dressed Peasant: 16th Century Flemish Workingwomen’s Dress” Drea Leed
“Embroideries and Samplers form Islamic Egypt” Marianne Ellis
“Needlework of Mary Queen of Scots” Margaret Swain
“Ecclesiastical Pomp and Aristocratic Circumstance” Spies

That’s about it. You guys asked for it…

Thanksgiving

Wed, 27 Nov 2002 14:24:45 GMT

Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, a time to have good food and good company. It is also a time of reflection. At least it is for me. The holiday season has always been important for me. It is one of the few times a year that I remember my family spending any kind of time together. You see not only did we not all live in the same house but also we were always involved in one activity or another. Between the five children we were involved in soccer, basketball, dance, gymnastics, swimming, theater, field hockey, ice hockey, choir, etc. It made for very little time at home. So it was always a special treat to actually sit down with the family and talk. As the youngest I really missed out on the family gatherings more so than the others because most of my sibling were grown and out of the house before I could really remember. So I use to wait impatiently for my brothers and sisters showed up on Thanksgiving.

There are other reason why I spend time reflecting on this holiday. For the first 16 years of my life I spent every Thanksgiving with my family. When I was 17 I spent Thanksgiving alone in a hospital. It was extremely hard for me to be there while my family was elsewhere. They did come to visit but it was in no way the same. That year I spent almost 6 months in the hospital fighting for my life in some respects. It was hard for me to realize that I was causing my family such pain. Spending that time alone made me realize how much I took my friends and family for granted. Because of that one year I make sure I take the time to appreciate the people around me. I also made the decision that I wasn’t going to hurt myself anymore if not for me but for them.

Over the years we have stopped spending the holidays with each other. Growing families and distance has kept us apart. But no matter where I am I take the time to pick up the phone and touch base. A quick hello makes all the difference.

So this year I will once again surround myself with loved one. No matter if they are friends or family I will hold them close to my heart and cherish the time I get with them. I look forward to the laughing and the sharing. And yes even the hours of football. Because in all honesty it is the smell of the turkey cooking that wakes you up in the morning, the smell of mulled spice in the afternoon, the hours of football, Santa closing out the Macy’s parade, and the hours of board games in the evening that really make this holiday a special time for me.

No matter how and where you spend your holiday this year, in the company of friend and/ or family please take the time to think about what makes the holiday special to you and why. Take time to cherish your surroundings, hug and kiss someone close to you, call that relative that you haven’t talked to in months, welcome that new family member with open arms and an open heart. But above all enjoy yourself. I know I will. Love to all.

Not much to say

Tue, 26 Nov 2002 14:38:23 GMT

Howdy all! I really don’t have much to say today. I am sure I can come up with some babble. The holidays are soon and I have some stuff I need to get together before then.

So lets see. This past weekend was fun. Didn’t do anything I was expecting to do but it was fun. So here is my best and worst of the weekend.

Best

Holiday faire- I was able to spend some money and buy some weaving supplies.

Into The Woods- One of my favorite musicals I found it on DVD and watched it on Friday night

Chinese Food- Yum

Weaving- Got to weave on my loom this weekend and got a lot done that I might actually have to warp it up again

Frontier House- Watched the whole show. It was really good, even if there were people who bitched all the time.

Worst

Staying up to 4 in the morning- I think I am just getting too old for that.

Cold weather- Saturday was cold, cold, cold

Not playing cards- Missing out on playing cards because we couldn’t find a fourth player

Spending way too much money- I know I did this to myself

Not long enough- Need I say more

So that was about it, nothing too exciting but over all a good weekend.

I must say that I am really looking forward to the holiday. I get to spend my Thanksgiving with some friends. It always makes me happy when I get to spend time with good people.

Well that is about all for me. Hope everyone has a great day!

The Little Things We Do

Thu, 21 Nov 2002 22:25:48 GMT

Ok for some reason I really got into observing people today. It is funny how much you can learn from someone just from paying attention to some of his or her little quirks.

One of the ladies I work with does several things. One she hates silence. If we are all eating lunch and there is a break in the conversation then she feels that she has to say something to get people talking again. She also has one laugh when she is nervous and one laugh when she finds something funny. Also her nose gets red when she gets upset.

Another lady I work with has arthritis in her hands and it really bothers her when the weather turns cold. I can always tell when it is bothering her because she is very careful and slow when she eats lunch. Also when we all sit and have lunch she has to sit in the same seat at the table and she has to face the door. I wonder if this is something that makes her feel more secure.

A third lady I work with also has some interesting lunch behavior. She always has to be the last one to come into the room for lunch. She hates to face the door and the chair she sits in has to be in the lowest position. She is also very self-conscious so she makes fun of her self before anyone else can.

So after these observations I had to think about some of the things I do. One I fidget. I can’t sit still for anything. I have also gotten into this habit (and I can’t believe I am even going to admit to it) of checking to see if a man is wearing a wedding ring or not. Even if I have no interest in him I always look at his ring finger to see it the gold band is there. Maybe it has been my recent encounters with married men or it might just be and instinct that all women have. Whenever a man is within 5 feet of us we must look at the left ring finger to see if he is married. I am not proud that I do this and I am going to make an effort to stop. It is just too cliché for me.

Anyway I am going to spend the evening doing girl things. I think I am going to curl up in my room and paint my nails and relax.

I hope you all do something to pamper yourself tonight.

Have a good one!